I guess this is the topic everyone will be so interested in in class.
Interpersonal communications.
Interpersonal communications can be within a group of people. but we seems to have narrow it down to communication between two party.
Which stage of the Knapp Model of Relational Development do you like and dislike most?
1. Initiating 2.Experimenting 3.Intensifying 4.Integrating 5.Bonding 6.Differentiating 7.Circumscribing 8.Stagnating 9.Avoiding q0.Terminating
well. i think initiating and experimenting stages are the sweetest. when u start to know someone and through communicating and knowing each other, finding out that both of you are so "compatible". that is sweet. (however thinking that being compatible for each other can be one of the reasons that lead to the stage i dislike circumscribing). experimenting is the sweet period where you get to know each other likes and dislike. compromising each other, learning to accommodate. Isn't this the stage where we go "ooo..so sweet" to couples we see?
Compromising and accommodating your partner is the sweetest thing ever. However it doesn't seems to last. When we are so attracted to each other, we seems to be able to tell ourselves that "it is alright. she is cute that way. i like her for who she is." but when time passes and the "true colour" of both partners reveal itself, we can't seems to accept the face that you like him/her due to the way she was in the start. then comments like "you have changed."start to appear in the conversation. Was it the other party changed or it is just that you were so wrong that you two were "compatible"? *laughs* human contradicts.
And after the "you have changed" part, comes the part where you just feel so irritated by the look of the person. the way they talk, walk, dress. (everything that you like from the start). Circumscribing comes. That is the part I dislike. I believe at that point of time, when you are looking back at the times you spent with the person, you still have some feelings for the other party, just that compromising and accommodating him or her isn't what you think of anymore. Even you try, you seems to be telling yourself "why am I the only one who is compromising?" *sad, but true*.
It takes two hands to clap(one yours and one from your partner). When one hand gets tired and stop clapping, it wont work out. I always tell my friends who ask advise about their relationship from me that, if you are not serious to settle down and manage a relationship, or you got no time for the other party, don't get into it and hurt the other party. This will only create negative flashback for him/her in the future. (: However, learning to manage your time in a relationship is also important. If you have never been in a relationship before then you will have to learn from zero. If you have been in a relationship before, then you can learn from your mistake in the past(that is if you wants to get into a relationship again). If you are in a relationship now and still struggling with prioritizing your time, it is best that you speak to your partner and see what the both of you can do. As this is an interpersonal communication, where you have to be able to prevent conflicts and you want to be "clapping" your way through this journey. (:
[[Taylor Swift-Love Story]] this is not the original MTV. it is with images of all the Disney princess love story. i think it is very sweet. i dun think guys will like it. (: *winks* Happy valentine's day to all. (:
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i like stage 3 best... it is probably the most romantic and sweetest stage of the relationship. The commitment, awareness and participation will increase. Both parties will tend to give more attention to each other. The way one express his/her feelings to the other party will be romantic and touching and real. The idea of 'a couple' will naturally come by.
ReplyDeleteas for what i dislike will be stage 8. 'Couple' just go through everyday for the sake of passing time. There is a lack of affection, joy and excitement in the relationship. 'Scripts' are then standard and dry. The couple are sometimes forced to be together even though without feelings. This can be because of their child. The child will be the victim if a divorce is filed.
Do not rush a relationship too fast or consequence will not be positive.
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ReplyDeleteTo be honest, i totally hate the Knapp Model. Because of the structured, yet unerringly accurate way it tries to explain a relationship.
ReplyDeleteIsnt it better if love was mysterious yet filled with joy as both parties are swept away by an emotional roller-coaster ride?
But unfortunately, things arent so rosy in the real world. Shit happens. Hence the need to justify a relationship scientifically to help root out problems at whichever stage we perceive we are experiencing.
Haha..I love the initiation stage where both parties just get to know one another.
ReplyDeleteThere's always this inner anticipation and thrill meeting a guy that you like. I also like the stage of bonding where friends and couples get to do the activities they could get to enjoy one another’s company. It’s like spending quality time together- Qualitative Approach- =D
Hi,,,
ReplyDeleteI like the initiation and experimenting stage,, because we feel something "strange" inside our body everytime we meet that person..... :D
I don't like the avoiding stage,,,, we and our partner will become apart,,, and sometimes,,, it seems like we don't know each other..... So sad.... :(
Hmmm for me, I guess the most important aspect of a relationship would be... "Intensifying". I mean, if there were no mutual feelings to "intensify" in the first place, how can you expect to sustain a relationship, no?
ReplyDeleteYes, I agree that it takes two hands to clap, but it is possible too, if one hand remains stagnant, and the other hand moves to strike the other hand. I don't know if i'm making any sense here, but. it's like, the clapping can continue, with effort coming from only one side, isn't it? it's hypothetical, but it is quite likely, esp if the person who isn't putting in any effort, is in it for the gains. sad, but true.
If that were the case, i'd rather not be 'clapping' at all. :(
is love blind. or does love blind.
ReplyDeleteselective biasness.
nostalgia as one puts it is simply a way to cope with loneliness.
with this i never ever think about the past. i am not one to dwell in the past though i believe it holds a certain amount of significance to us.
you talk about the practical aspects of a relationship. the demands. but those demands vary from person to person and even the degree of love affects it.
it's interesting as a lot of people seem to discussing along the lines of love.
love is becoming a commodity.
so what's the price on it? probably only you will know.